Worrying about the past or the future isn’t productive. When you start chastising yourself for past mistakes, or seeing disaster around every corner, stop and take a breath and ask yourself what you can do right now to succeed.
Have you ever worried yourself so much that you become physically and emotionally exhausted?
Do you frequently feel hopeless, uneasy, or suspicious of the people and things around you?
As someone who has always worried excessively, I understand what it’s like to feel imprisoned by anxiety.
My primary concerns and obsessions were hypothetical, imagined, and the countless “what-if” situations. After a while, I concluded that if I worried about everything that could go wrong in my life, I would either altogether avoid them or become immune to their consequences.
The fears grew more intense as time passed and the amount of obligations rose. I started to worry about how well I was raising my kids. My concerns included money, jobs, and public perception.
Then, I had a little panic attack one day. I was so overwhelmed by everything I had to accomplish that day that I started to feel quite afraid and dizzy.
My heart thumped in my chest, and my legs swayed beneath me, giving me the impression that I was temporarily living in a different universe. I went straight to a quiet spot and sat until the emotions subsided.
I was aware that this was a warning. I had to learn how to control my stress and nervousness before they went out of control.
I’ve discovered over the years that accepting the following five realities prevents worry from becoming out of control:
1. Your worries are not yours
I tried to stop worrying for an extended period, as most people who worry do. I soon discovered that attempting to halt worrying thoughts was like stopping a torrent from flowing.
Eventually, I discovered a profoundly basic concept that completely transformed my life:
Your feelings do not define you.
This is the power of detachment. It’s the detachment that lets you experience your feelings without attaching yourself to them, not the stoic one.
I started putting this into practice by looking at my worries in a nonjudgmental way. As I kept observing myself, I gained acceptance for my incapacity to put my fears aside. However, I also discovered that I could improve how I handled those unsettling thoughts. You may experience the same thing.
2. There is no room for worry right now
We should give our current concerns more thought. Future-focused behaviour driven by apprehension and uncertainty is worrying.
This realization was yet another paradigm shift for me. Upon reflection, I realized that every concern was related to an uncertain future. But what about history? I was concerned about previous occurrences that I thought would negatively impact my future.
Would you like to avoid worrying altogether? Remain in the present moment. I learned how to accomplish this using mindfulness meditation. When you lose yourself in the moment, an essential mindfulness exercise is to pay attention to your breathing. Allow each breath to anchor you precisely where you are.
3. Anxiety is containable
If you’ve ever experienced worry, you know how quickly it can take over your entire day. I experienced this frequently. After I was able to accept it, I chose to contain my anxiety instead of letting it run wild and take control of my life. Set aside a specific period to let my mind meditate on its most recent concern. Let it go after that time.
Do you wish to contain your anxiety? Consider allocating ten to thirty minutes each day to fret. During this time, picture yourself feeling nervous, write down your thoughts, and devise a plan of action to address the underlying reasons for your anxiety. If the worry resurfaces outside this planned window, put it off until the following worry period.
4. You can surrender your concern
Have you ever noticed that the more attention you give yourself, the more worried you get? I used to turn inward when I was concerned. I neglected the needs of others in favour of my wants, and it rarely eased my concerns.
One thing I discovered about myself through self-observation was that I tended to forget my issues when I cared about others and attended to their needs. I use the onset of worry as an opportunity to talk to a loved one or call a lonely acquaintance. I discovered how to release my anxiety.
5. You are a human being
I was more concerned about my attempt to be superhuman. I was attempting to please everyone, and I was constantly worried about their opinion of me. Rather than criticizing myself for falling short of everyone’s standards, I accepted my limitations. I cannot win over everyone, and I am at peace with that.
Now Is the Time to Decide
I understand that incorporating these suggestions may be difficult for you, particularly if, like the majority of us, you’ve battled a long-standing tendency to ignore anxiety rather than confront it head-on.
However, you can overcome this tendency little by little. Imagine a life free from the grip that anxiety has on you. a life in which anxiety is restrained and under control. Imagine being fully present to the people you love without dealing with worry’s draining emotional effects.
Refrain from worrying. Right now.
Keep yourself apart from it. Limit it. And give it up.
